Here's The Phrases That Are On Our Wacky Tombstones:

Lawn Care Has Become A Big Highlight In Your Life
Your Idea Of Weightlifting Is Standing Up
You Start Videotaping Daytime Game Shows
Your Back Goes Out More Than You Do
Caution Is The Only Thing You Exercise
Your Knees Buckle But Your Belt Won't
It Takes A Couple Of Tries To Get Over A Speed Bump
You Burn The Midnight Oil After 8:00PM
You Get Winded Playing Chess
Happy Hour Is Nap Time
You Wear Black Socks With Sandals
Dialing Long Distance Wears You Out
You Got Cable TV Just For The Weather Channel
Your Childhood Toys Are In A Museum
You're Asleep But Others Worry You Are Dead
The Candles Cost More Than The Cake

Birthday Phrases:

(Name) You Know You're Over The Hill When... Happy (Age) Birthday!

Anniversary/Love Phrases:

Graduation Phrases:

Retirement Phrases:

New Home Phrases:

Get Well Soon Phrases: